r/tifu 7d ago

Mod Post Trialling a rule to limit posts involving sexual content to the weekend.


For a very long time the largest criticism that we've seen of this sub is that the posts are disproportionally focused on sexual content. We've actually run the numbers on this in the past and only about 15% of posts in /r/TIFU are sexual in nature, but that number rises to over 30% of posts in Top of Month and over 50% of front page posts. Subscribers who have been here for a while may remember that we used to have a rule limiting NSFW posts to the weekend. This rule was scrapped about 5 years ago along with a dozen other archaic rules in an effort to simplify and revitalise the sub (and it succeeded; /r/TIFU used to have traffic comparable to subs with under 100k subscribers while being over 100 times larger, and it vastly improved after the rules were simplified). But since its removal there has been a perpetual call from users and mods alike to reinstate it in some form or fashion.

This is something we've debated about for a long time, and we have heard the innumerable complaints from users. Deciding whether a complaint is being expressed by the overall userbase or a vocal minority is trickier than you'd think though: These NSFW posts consistently garner positive attention and lots of traffic, which indicates that users enjoy these posts, in contrast to what is often echoed by users in posts and comments. Ultimately as a modteam we value the quality of the sub over the number of clicks it receives, but these things are never as simple as they're made out to be.

Nevertheless, we've decided to trial a practical solution, and temporarily bring back the old 'weekend rule' to observe any changes in user engagement and sub quality that such a rule would cause.


Starting today (the 29th May) and until the 12th June (2 weeks), we will only allow NSFW and sex-related posts on the weekend.

This amendment has been added to Rule 4:

C. Posts involving sexual or similar NSFW content are allowed only during the weekend.

We will be defining the weekend as beginning 12pm Friday UTC and ending 11:59am Monday UTC. This way it accounts for all time zones, if it's the weekend somewhere it'll count.

Upon the end of the 2 weeks we will be returning to the regular ruleset; however, a post will be made at the end to gather your feedback, from which we'll decide on whether or not to make it a permanent change at a later point.

We may trial similar rules in the future - Feel free to post your suggestions to /r/IdeasForTIFU!

r/tifu 3d ago

XL An open letter on the state of affairs regarding the API pricing and third party apps and how that will impact moderators and communities.

Thumbnail self.ModCoord

r/tifu 3h ago Take My Energy

S TIFU by complaining about a Lyft incident, and then getting doxxed by their official account after hitting the front page


You may have read my original post this morning about how I had a Lyft driver pressuring me to give him my personal phone number and email address before my ride. I felt unsafe and canceled. Even after escalating, Lyft refused to refund me. Only after my posts hit 3 million views, did they suddenly try to call me and they offered me my $5 refund.

But get this. Suddenly I'm getting tagged and I discover that their official account has posted for the first time in ages.... and DOXXED me in the thread. Instead of tagging my username, since I posted anonymously, their post reads "Dear [My real name]".

And here is the kicker, that is normally a bannable offense. Instead, the comment is removed by the moderators from the thread, but it has not been removed from their profile nor has their profile been banned as a normal user would be. It's still up!

Not sure what to do to get it removed. Any media I can contact to put pressure on Lyft??

TL;DR: Got myself DOXXED by the official Lyft account, which reddit apparently does not want to ban or even remove the comment.

Edit: After 5 hours, they removed my name. One of their execs just emailed me to inform me that they removed it, and suggested I could delete my Lyft account. I suggested they clean up their PR and CS teams because they're not doing so well today.

For your amusement: she is one of the top execs and she is located in the central time zone, so she was doing this at 11:00 p.m. 😂 Sounds like they are finally awake and paying attention. 👋

r/tifu 1d ago LOVE!

Removed - Rule 3 TIFU by visiting a dentist while being homeless in Seattle


TL;DR: Don’t sign the waiver the dentist gives you mid procedure.

So this actually happened back in 2013. But it still affects me to this day, and I want to share my experience as a warning.

In 2013, I was several years into a heroin addiction that tried its best to kill me. The status of my teeth was abysmal. But, I was trying to turn things around and got myself on Medicaid. I eventually found a dentist office in Lynnwood that would take my insurance. “Alder Lynn Family Dentistry”

The only thing they will do for you when your insurance is Medicaid is extractions. I came in to get a molar pulled, and what ended up happening left me shook.

The first thing they explained was that having nitrous during the procedure would cost $30. I didn’t have that, I was destitute, so I was unable to get it during the procedure. What happened next, I still feel should be considered medical malpractice.

The doctor was trying to extract the tooth, but he couldnt get it to come out. The pain was unbearable. I’m a 6’3” tall male, and I was crying, howling in pain. The dentist says: “STOP CRYING. ITS NO BIG DEAL YEAH?”, so I do my best to contain my emotions, despite the pain. Then, as he was basically standing on the chair, trying to force the tooth out, I hear a CRACK. He had broken the tooth next to it. He basically jumps down, runs out of the offide and returns with a waiver form. He says “you have to sign this”. Through my tears, I sign the waiver. I just want this to be over with. He ends up pulling both teeth, and kicks me out as fast as possible. My friend was waiting in the parking lot, so I ran up to her and hugged her while sobbing.

This is just one of many stories I have about how I eventually overcame being a homeless drug addict in Seattle. But it’s one that really has stuck with me over the years. There is still a massive gap in my teeth from the missing molar. The people at the Edmonds Community Health Clinic were completely different. They really helped me a lot and actually listened to my concerns.

My biggest advice to anyone in any sort of similar circumstances is to stay the fuck away from Lynnwood. Aside from this, the judge and warden feed off the suffering of others (see https://www.heraldnet.com/news/facing-pressure-lynnwood-council-postpones-vote-on-new-jail/ for example).

r/tifu 1d ago

S TIFU by falling asleep on my girl’s butt


This happened tonight so TI literally FU. So my girl and I were Netflix and chilling in her bed. At some point, she turned on Pitch Perfect and fell asleep on her stomach 10 minutes in to the movie, so I laid down on her butt. It’s a thing between us. She has a very comfortable ass to lay on. I ended up falling asleep as well, and suddenly, she jerked awake from a nightmare and flipped me over and off the bed, where I hit my head on her nightstand and slit the side of my head open on the corner. I immediately became dizzy, she got out of bed, and came to my aid. She drove me to the hospital because I was bleeding pretty bad. Long story short, I suffered a concussion and needed 4 stitches. Not my first concussion, but this one definitely hurt the most. 10/10 do not recommend hitting your head on the corner of a solid oak nightstand.

TL;DR: Fell asleep on my girl’s booty, she jerked awake from a nightmare, and I hit my head on her nightstand, where I was bleeding profusely. She took me to the hospital and found out I suffered another concussion and needed 4 stitches.

r/tifu 14h ago

M TIFU by ordering 10 yards of soil while my husband was recovering from surgery.


This happened in June of 2020. My husband had hip replacement surgery March 11th so right before covid lockdown in my country. The surgery went well and my workplace was in partial shutdown so my shifts were being canceled weekly.

I was getting CERB so I had an income and the city had made a mess of my yard about a year before when they redid the water mains. My side yard was also a disaster because we'd had our sewer line replaced. So I figured I had some free time and I ordered 10 yards of topsoil to repair all the damage. I live in the city so 10 yards sounded great. Spoiler: it was far too much, like 5 yards too much.

So I got all this soil on Wednesday. On Thursday I get a call from work that I'm going back on Monday. So here I am with a pile of dirt that is so huge it is overflowing onto the sidewalk, a convalescent husband and a rickety wheelbarrow that was probably 60 years old.

Well, I broke that wheelbarrow in about 2 days. And it's covid, so there isn't a wheelbarrow to be found in my area for less than $200. Working 10 hour days in a factory. What a mess. But I persevered. I spent hours with pails going back and forth, until a friend of my husband's took pity on me and leant me his wheelbarrow. I ended up moving much of the pile behind my shed once I was done with my landscaping project.

It was lots of fun working my butt off in the unrelenting July and August sun shoveling, raking, planting grass seed and watering while working a very physical job. And let's not forget my so helpful husband sitting on the front porch giving me all his totally welcome advice. Man did he get a lot of side eye from the neighbors that summer.

The very pinnacle of that time was my husband telling me that it was getting a little dusty in the house. Like, are you serious? You're back to work and you can't help me in the yard which I totally understand and this was completely my project. But you have 2 hands. If you don't like a little dust, do it yourself. I'm pretty sure he got my point because the next day I got home from work and the whole house was dusted and vacuumed.

By September I had the front and side yards seeded and growing, it was great. I also put a layer of topsoil on my back yard but before I was ready to seed it started getting cold. What I did seed didn't make it through the first real cold snap.

Then came the winter of mud. I have 2 labs who love mud. So much mud in my house. I even bought one of those foot washing cups for dog paws. It helped a little I guess, if I could get them to stay at the back door. Once it froze things were better, until spring.

Spring melts were awful. Mud and dog poop cocktails all over my house. So gross. And my lovely husband laughing his butt off at me because I'm trapped in a muddy poop storm which just got better every time my girl had a good roll in the muck. Labs, they love to roll in gross. That back yard was seeded and growing buy the middle of June.

Three years later, the grass is healthy, the yard looks great, and all the extra I put behind the shed has been used to fill in low spots that developed over that first disaster of a winter. I know where the best diy dog bathing facilities are in my city and my husband is happily retired and does the lions share of the housework.

TL;DR I ordered twice as much topsoil as I needed expecting lockdown to give me enough free time to deal with it, got called back into work within 5 days and gave my dogs a playground of mud to track into my house for 6 months.

r/tifu 2h ago

S TIFU by overestimating my tolerance.


So I’m 18 years old and no stranger to smoking weed. I do it every few weeks, and it usually just makes me calm/high.

I kinda forgot what weed ALSO does.

Also, I hadn’t eaten anything the whole day. And it was like 90 degrees. So I wasn’t feeling too good.

So I’m smoking with my friends, take two hits off his cart, and immediately start feeling dizzy. The best way I can think to describe it is “dreamlike”. It was super unsettling. So everyone is sort of laughing it off but I started to freak out bc that’s never happened to me before. My friend brings me in the house and that’s when shit gets BAD. Really bad.

My tongue goes numb, then the rest of my body, and at that point I’m fully convinced I’m going to die. I start begging him to call 911 because I’m convinced I got laced and I’m fucking dying. Obviously this wasn’t true bc I was breathing normally the whole time.

But it kept getting worse. At that point I feel like I’m getting snapped out of existence by Thanos. I grab onto my friend Peter Parker style and start telling him that I love him and shit, yknow bc if im gonna die on his couch I might as well let him know I appreciate it.

All these thoughts were running through my head. I wouldn’t go to college. Wouldn’t become a writer. And the worst thought of all: My friends would totally think I was lame.

Eventually I snap out of it, and the first thing I said was “do you still think I’m cool?”

So yeah. Just a panic attack. But def in my top ten worst experiences.

TLDR: Don’t do drugs on an empty stomach, kids.

r/tifu 15h ago

M TIFU by saying "fuck it, just get it over with" when the anesthetic didn't work when putting back a torn out fingernail


I had just started lifting and being the rookie bodybuilder I was, took every suggestion that came my way. (This was about a year ago). I'm a morning person and in the gym there were always the same four people in the morning, so we got to know each other over a couple of months.

This elderly man showed me this "new" exercise with dumbbells where you basically bend over and do flies for your back. I copied him and he told me to change my grip. Alright, change my grip. Fine. I grew a little too enthusiastic and the dumbbells clashed together on their way down, somehow catching the middle finger of my left hand between them. First I was just dumbfounded. Oh fuck. Just as If it had come between a door. Then the pain intensified and blood started gushing out.

I went to the toilets and held it under running water. The entire sink was red and I was on the verge of passing out. Vision blurry, lightheaded, the whole shebang. The janitor bandaged it and after that I went home where I took some painkillers. The pain kept getting worse however and I felt like something was wrong. I had seen that the nail wasn't in the right spot. 80% of the nail under the nailbelt horizontally had been torn out so that I could see the part of my nail usually under my skin. I decided to go to the hospital and because it was a Sunday couldn't get in touch with my GP first, meaning it'd all be on my own costs (Netherlands care system).

In the hospital a doctor checked it out and after discussing with other doctors decided it was best to put the nail back in to protect the nailbed or something. He gave me some anaesthetic and then we had to wait for it to work. It did nothing, but he then had to leave for an emergency when an ambulance came in. Another two hours go by before he comes back. He pumps in some more anaesthetic and we wait. Then some more because it didn't work. Eventually, I just said, "fuck it. Just get it over with." He asked whether I was sure and I told him yes. Big mistake

He tried pushing it back in place and I was grunting in pain. He asked if I was okay and I told him no, but to finish it regardless. He had it in place and was ready to put in stitches. Then he loosened his grip and it flopped back out. He got another Docter to help. Now this woman was rough. Not the soft lady's touch I was hoping for. She doubled up the force she put on it and kept it there. At this point the people in the next room over, and probably the one after that, heard the grunting. Meanwhile, I was swearing under my breath "ah motherfucker" then apologized. She said it was okay and that she knew how much it must hurt.

Then the stitches came. One went through the tip of my finger, the other above my nail to form a sort of X over my nail. Now keep in mind your fingertips are very sensitive. This hurt nearly as much as the initial pushing back of the nail.

"The worst is over now, right?"

"Erm, almost." Then the man proceeded to tighten the stitches. More swearing ensued.

Worst pain I've ever experienced.

One week later I had to come back for a check up and the whole thing was brown/green as if it was dead. Turned out alright though and now my finger looks normal again.

TL;DR nail was torn out while weightlifting and was put back in without anaesthetic. Worst pain of my life.

r/tifu 7h ago

S TIFU : I couldn't stop my dogs from destroying a wild turkey family


TW: dog eating a baby animal

English is not my first language, so sorry for the mistake. So today, I fuck up.

I was walking with my 3 dogs, my neighbor, and her dog in a clear field just on the edge of the forest both happy our fur babies were tired of their play/running like crazy play session.

When out of nowhere, my oldest found a wild turkey completely hidden, and then, the litteral shit show began. The turkey appeared under ou eyes while it flew away and bombarded poo! One of my dog started to chase it. Me and my neighbor screamed for my dog to came back, while preventing the others from rolling in the foul smelling feces. Discovering the turkey was a mama, and not alone. Finding my youngest with a whole baby in her mouth. Cue more screaming. Pulling my other dog to prevent it from, him too, eating a baby turkey. The youngest clearly enjoying her snack while I was busy. It was a huge mess.

After a while, we were able to move away from the crime scene and retreive all the dogs, but not before the massacre happened. There is at least 2 casualities, but we might have missed more.

TLDR: My dogs found a hidden wild turkey family. The mama flew away while shitting. 2 babies were killed, one eaten as a whole. TIFU hard.

I'm so sorry wild turkey for your babies!!! May them RIP.

r/tifu 13h ago

S TIFU by claiming someone else's ass blast


Welcome friends, TIFU when my partner, friends, and I sat down to watch movies. We were having fun, commenting on things throughout the movie. About halfway through my friend rips ass. I mean absolutely blew a hole through his pants. Man had a full brass orchestra in his boxers. It was impressive honestly. He had everyone's attention in that moment and before my brain could decide between saying "wasn't me" and "excuse you" I blurted out "Excuse me!" The silence I was met with, and then my friend finally saying "you... didn't do that? I did??" And at that point everyone was just baffled and laughing so hard at me that I couldn't even get a word in to explain. So now, I'm the guy that steals peoples farts.

TL;DR - friend blows a hurricane out his ass and I said I was the one who farted a portal to hell.

r/tifu 1d ago Wholesome

S TIFU by Accidentally Broadcasting My Karaoke Session to the Entire Company


So, this happened just yesterday, and I'm still cringing at the thought of it. I work for a pretty large tech company, and we've been working remotely since the pandemic hit. We use a popular video conferencing tool for all our meetings, and it's been a lifesaver. But yesterday, it turned into my worst nightmare.

I had just finished a long, draining meeting with some clients and decided to take a break. My go-to stress buster is singing karaoke. I have a whole setup at home - a microphone, a speaker, and a karaoke app on my laptop. I decided to belt out some of my favorite tunes to lift my spirits.

Here's where the FU begins. I thought I had exited the video conferencing tool after the meeting, but I hadn't. I was still logged in, and worse, I was still screen sharing. I didn't realize this as I opened my karaoke app and started my solo concert.

I sang my heart out, performing dramatic renditions of everything from Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" to Britney Spears' "Oops!...I Did It Again". I was in my own world, completely oblivious to the fact that my performance was being broadcasted live to my entire company.

I only realized what had happened when I started receiving a flood of messages on my phone. My colleagues were texting me, some in fits of laughter, others in secondhand embarrassment. My boss even sent me a message saying, "Nice voice, but maybe save it for after work hours?"

I quickly closed the karaoke app and the video conferencing tool, my face burning with embarrassment. I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out.

So, there you have it. I'm now known as the Karaoke King at work, and I don't think I'll live this down anytime soon. The only silver lining? My boss did say I had a nice voice.

TL;DR: Thought I had logged out of a video conference after a meeting. Started a karaoke session while still screen sharing, broadcasting my performance to the entire company. Now known as the Karaoke King at work.

r/tifu 2m ago

S TIFU by getting sunburnt on my nipples


Today I went to a nude beach. For context, I already have pretty tan skin, but I’m much lighter in those spot where the sun don’t shine if you know what I mean. Nevertheless, I made sure to apply plenty of sunscreen knowing my skin would be exposed to the elements. Now, whenever I apply moisturizer to my skin I make sure to avoid getting it on my nipples, because it can clog the nipple ducts or whatever. Out of habit, I must’ve missed applying sunscreen to my nipples. I spent a few hours in the sun with my nips out, exposed to the harsh sun. When it was finally time to go, I put a shirt on and immediately felt searing pain in my nipples. I looked down my shirt and my nipples were red and puffy. Every time my shirt brushed my nipples it felt like a hot iron touching my nips. I got home and my nipples had swelled twice their normal size. I tried to take a shower but as soon as the water touched my nipples it felt like they were being deep fried. I tried putting ice cubes on them but it just felt like some weird kinky ice play. I tried to put aloe on my nipples but it just stung like some more kinky nipple play. Wearing a shirt irritates my burnt nipples so badly I’ve been walking around my apartment completely topless since yesterday.

TL;DR: I forgot sunscreen on my nipples and got Burnt so badly my nipples swelled twice their size.

r/tifu 52m ago

S TIFU after years of my academic bullshit my mother lost it.


To provide backstory, I am currently 18 and 4 years ago I made a deal that if I were to graduate with my friends, that she wouldn't mind staying down in Texas with me till graduation.

I have a horrible habit of falling behind and it cost me 2 summers, 4 different season breaks, and with me having 3 class periods a day to finish my courses. The total of courses being 3. My teachers, family, friends and even people I don't usually speak with say I could easily pass my courses in a matter of weeks if I just pulled my head out of my rear and did the work. Which I'm only now learning how right they were, but at the cost of my latest summer.

Unfortunately I am now a senior in June and hopefully will finish my final course before the end of the month. My sister now wants to stay behind and my mother's growing extremely annoyed with me as I was the reason she's stuck in Texas for 4+ years. If I am lucky then I'll be done by the end of the week and will graduate by month's end.

I'm now trying to figure out how to apologize to her for the stress I caused to her and my father is going to help me get some flowers for when I do finish the course I'm in. My father says he has never seen her so distraught and I feel horrible for what I did to her. I just wish I hadn't been so stupid and just paid attention in my classes so she wouldn't be in this head space.

TL;DR, I horribly screwed my chance of graduating on time and need to apologize. What else should I do to apologize?

r/tifu 57m ago

S TIFU by underestimating the sun.


So, I don’t live in a very sunny place - at least a place where it’s too cold to sunbathe. I’m not used to spending hours relaxing on the beach or reading a book under the hot sun. So, expectedly, I have no frame of reference on how to tan my body - all I know is that after the first sunburn, I tan excellently.

For years I’ve been attempting to perfect my tanning technique by avoiding the initial burn and only staying in the sun for a bit at a time to build up my tolerance. So, when I ended up in the Carolinas for a vacation on the sea, I attempted that technique, and in a mixture of hubris, pride, stupidity, laziness, forgetfulness, etc., I didn’t apply sunscreen. Oops. BIG oops.

So, after a quick dip in the ocean, I relax on my beach chair to read a chapter of my book. I only end up spending an hour in the noonday sun, either reading or listening to music, and when I look down at my chest, it still looks pretty darn pale.

A while later I end up dipping into a hot tub, only to find that when the water reaches my waistline, it becomes excruciatingly hot. Once I finally get myself used to the heat, I look down to see red. Pure red. It looked like a firetruck somehow crossed with chest hair and nipples! Turns out I burned myself so badly that some of the Floridians I was staying with considered it one of the worst they’d ever seen.

I am in pain…

TL;DR - Forgot sunscreen on a sunny day, forgot how to sunbathe, and now I am a lobster.

r/tifu 8h ago

S TIFU by not double checking the basket


I made a mistake and accidentally threw everything in the basket in the wash not knowing there was a book in there Then the book messed up everything I'm afraid of my parents finding out and I already messed up today. This all started when I threw my hoodie in the basket and forgot my hoodie had a note book in the pocket and put it to wash. I thought I checked everything but not the hoodie and fucked up everything my washing machine is clogged and my dryer is clogged and my parents are very strict. And I've got through enough yelling and now I'm afraid of my parents finding out.

TL;DRI left a book in my hoodie and fucked up the washing machine and dryer

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r/tifu 17h ago

S TIFU by drinking a beer with a friend


For context, i'm a belgian student in security. Last week was exams week, so that means we basically have not much school days left and they're not important anymore, and i'm pretty tired with the school year being one of my worst experiences to date. But still i wanna join the police in a few years, and always wanted to since i was a kid, so i might have fucked up big.

So today, a normal school day, me and a friend went out of school in morning break to crack a beer up in front of the school (yes we dumb) thinking it was just whatever and the whole idea seemed pretty funny to us at first tbh. Well we got seen by a teacher and were told we'd receive a sanction . The sanction isn't that big since we never did anything else wrong during the whole year but the thing is it will be written on our disciplinary book. I fear that my whole plan of joining the police is now fucked because of this one dumb incident.

TL;DR : I drank a beer with a friend during school morning break and now fear for my future in the police because of my disciplinary book.

r/tifu 1d ago

S TIFU by rescuing a squirrel from my dog


Happened yesterday.

I was inside the house when I heard my wife call out, "Babe, J got a squirrel!" Knowing my wife's aversion to dead animals, I put on my shoes and head outside to the backyard and find our dog in the bushes. I look down and see the squirrel on his back, splayed out. Seeing the squirrel's eyes still open and moving, I pull J away and pick up the squirrel. With no blood, no apparent broken bones, I set the squirrel right and it limp-scampered away.

I bring J back to the back door and hold her there for a bit, allowing enough time for the squirrel to get out of the backyard. After a couple minutes, I let J go, and she went on the hunt. It didn't take her long to find the squirrel again, and again I went to go take care of what I thought would surely be a dead squirrel. After all, J is a terrier mix, and well, pit bulls have strong bites. Nope, the squirrel was back in the splayed-out position and J was right over the squirrel, teasing/taunting him like the squirrels had done to her.

I pick up the squirrel, see that he's still breathing and can feel his heart beating rapidly. But the squirrel seemed lethargic and I honestly wasn't sure he was going to make it. Still, with some life in him, I decided to release the squirrel in the front yard and let it decide where he wants to die, if it was indeed the end for him. I went through our garage and as I pressed the button to open up the garage door, the squirrel seemed to become more active and alive again.

And then the rat bastard bit me. Not once, not twice, but three times. I finally get out to the front and more or less dropped the squirrel who scampered away, limping. It was at this moment that I thought, "I really should have let J finish the squirrel."

ETA: At the suggestion of many caring individuals, I will be heading to urgent care tonight to address any possible infections including rabies, just to make sure. Thank you all for the outpouring of advice. I tend to be stubborn at times!

TL;DR: I saved a squirrel from certain death from my dog, and he (ETA: the squirrel) thanked me by biting me three times.

r/tifu 1d ago

S TIFU by following a girl I barely knew to her front door after sharing an Uber


Myself, her and her friend were at a house party after going the pub. Her friend ushered me to leave with them and then on the way asked where I was going when they got home, to which I replied home I guess.

I didn’t pay for that Uber so my dumbass got out a few seconds after them and followed to the door which they had closed by then. I then knocked thinking I could maybe wait for the next Uber to get back home and they didn’t answer.

I messaged a little later saying sorry didn’t mean to weird you out just wanted to wait for the next Uber, she didn’t reply and now I feel like a creep.

Dunno what I was thinking to be honest I was just drunk and being a bit slow and now I’ve made myself look like a weirdo. Not sure what to say when I inevitably see either of them next at the pub, or if I should just say nothing and play it cool.

For extra context, I didn’t know these girls before that night but I’ve seen them in my local pub before so I’m sure I’ll see them again.

Any advice to avoid making myself look even weirder?

TL;DR Followed a girl to her door after an Uber ride and it was shut so I knocked and she didn’t answer probably thinking I was a psycho

r/tifu 1d ago

M TIFU by putting glue on my cat.


DISCLAIMER: There was NO intentional animal abuse in the making of this TIFU.

So for some reason, we have an extremely drug resistant brand of flea around here. When my Shadow (a 7 year old black cat) was younger, he got fleas every year. This led to a lot of bites, and they got into everything. I only managed to get rid of them using a specialist spray my vet provided, and a prescription ointment. After flea bombing the entire house, covering it with the new spray and using the prescription, we finally got rid of them.

My local vet has a scheme where you pay a monthly fee, and it includes all their annual shots, flea and worm treatment. You also get a small discount on vet consultations. No-brainer for me. Between that and my vet insurance.

So the medicine is mailed to me, and is mailed in my cat's name! My cat actually gets mail and I love this, it's adorable. So I opened it, there's a little silver blister pack with his worm pill, and a tiny white squeeze tube of flea treatment with tiny writing.

I have shockingly bad eyesight.

So onto the next part of our tale. I have extremely brittle nails from years of biting, and I had one snap right down to the nail bed. My approach to this was to stick a false nail over it, which stops most of the pain. Unfortunately it drops off from time to time, so I had the glue out on my desk from having recently re-applied said false nail.

You can see where this is going.

My Shadow is skittish, and he knows when it's medicine time, despite 7 years of incentivising with treats, getting him stoned on catnip, trying to get him when he's chill... he tends to bolt and run. So I caught him on the couch, which is next to my desk. I hold him by the neck and grab the tube from my desk to put it on before he escapes.

Except I grabbed the wrong tiny white tube.

I start to feel the heat from the glue drying on my hand, and I see a clump of fur on the back of his neck, and of course he's crying, meowing his objections. Knowing it's an irritant, I immediately called the vet for advice. They book him in and have me go on over.

It was the evening. My main vet is closed. I must attend the out of hours vet, and pay something close to £400 for the privilege. At one point they were talking about sedating him so they could properly shave and apply ointment and pain relief to the area, and calling the poisons unit (I supplied the empty tube of glue). But one of the staff was able to hold him while the other worked. My poor little guy has a nasty scar on the back of his neck and a bald patch. I spent most of the night waiting in the waiting room and crying and calling myself all manner of awful names, and of course, apologising to my Shadow.

My poor cat suffered from my mistake, and I feel terrible. Not to mention it's an expensive mistake. My insurance should cover this, but I had to pay up-front, and I'll have to claim it back. Even if they do pay me, it'll be 30 days, and minus my excess (I believe it's £100).

I am of course spoiling him with his favourite food and treats. He's avoided me since but does come for the odd conversation and a cuddle. I hope he forgives me.

TL;DR- TIFU by mixing up two identically sized white vials, leading to me accidentally putting nail glue on my poor kitty's neck instead of his prescription flea ointment.

P.s., Cat Tax.

r/tifu 1d ago

S TIFU by asking a drunk guy to be my spotter


There's a hill in a residential neighborhood that i like to longboard down when possible. At the bottom of the hill you can continue straight or as i like to do, make a right turn. The problem is I can't see the cars coming from the right until I get close enough where it might be dangerous. Lately if im in the area ill ask someone who doesn't look busy if they can watch the road and wave me through if its clear. So last night I saw a guy whose always walking his dog. I explained how I wanted to go down the hill and make a right and to wave if its clear.

He said "Sure, go up the hill" I went up, made eye contact so he knew I was going, then rode down the hill. For the next 30 seconds he never took his eyes off me, never looked at the road and gave me a thumbs up as I was getting closer to the bottom. The road was in fact not clear and a cab pulled up as i should have made the turn. I realized he never looked at the road once so I rode it out and continued straight ignoring his thumbs up. I had to go home in the same direction he was walking his dog, and as I passed him I noticed him stumbling while waiting for his dog to pee. I thought he was just really chill but I'm starting to think he was wasted instead.

TL,DR asked a guy to watch for cars as I skated down a hill. He stood there like a statue watching me instead of the road while giving me a thumbs up.